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(UPDATED AND REVISED EDITION)
"In Two Pews from Crazy, the author takes us on a painful but always hopeful spiritual journey that made me think of Pilgrim's Progress. Each time this lesbian Christian pastor nears the "Celestial City," there's another "Slough of Despond," "Valley of Humiliation" or "River of Death" to cross. It's a kind of miracle that Rev. Cyd is still standing after being born a female in a male dominated culture, after accepting her sexual orientation in the homophobic South, after refusing to renounce her call to ministry in a Christian community that forbids women clergy, after adopting a child, losing three different partners and suffering through spiritual and emotional abuse as a pastor.
Cyd has a great sense of humor. The chapters are short. Her story is honest, frank, easy to follow and never dull. And though her journey is sometimes painful to read, it is also a celebration of God's presence and power in the life of a lesbian, Christian pastor who never stops believing that God loves her and is with her every step of the way.
Reading Cyd's story reminded me that God loves me, too, and is with me on my own sometimes painful journey. If you need to be reminded of the Holy Spirit's presence and power in your life, just sit down next to Rev. Cyd just Two Pews from Crazy and enjoy."
---Mel White, Author, Stranger at the Gate, to be Gay and Christian in America
- Sales Rank: #1052206 in eBooks
- Published on: 2016-01-15
- Released on: 2016-01-15
- Format: Kindle eBook
About the Author
Rev. Cynthia (Cyd) is an author, speaker, writer, preacher, teacher, humorist, spiritual intuitive, Light worker, and follower of Christ. She was the founding pastor of Holy Trinity Community Church in Nashville, Tennessee, one of the fastest growing United Church of Christ congregations in the Southeast, for 18 years. Her ministry as a pastor touched thousands of lives with a message of hope and courage. She brings a unique sense of humor and passion to her message that leaves audiences inspired. She is currently an author and national speaker with her ministry, Ignite Your Soul Now; and also works as a Senior Church Consultant with The Center for Progressive Renewal.
Most helpful customer reviews
8 of 9 people found the following review helpful.
'Come, journey with me and find your hope again.’
By Grady Harp
South Carolina born Cyd Andrews-Looper has the courage, the faith, and the infectious sense of humor to subtitle her memoir ‘My Insane Journey From Christian Fundamentalism To A Faith of Love Alone--LGBTQ Minister.’ And that sort of sums up the outline of this superb little book. The timing could not be better: we continue to find the media focused on gay issues, transgender issues, racism, the politics of fundamentalism, parenting, the role of the church/religious differences as they affect our life and ‘safety’ and on and on – and then up pops Cindy with a more than difficult personal history to relate and create a voyage of faith and hope and triumph for so many people. No, for all of us!
Cindy (that is her nickname of choice) states her reason for coming to commit her story in a well-scribed introduction – a passage that immediately draws us to her as a fellow traveller: ‘November 2014 I am in the midst of transition as I type these words. A month ago, I left an eighteen-year ministry as pastor of Holy Trinity Community Church in Nashville, Tennessee. I started a small Bible study in the fall of 1996, not knowing it would eventually grow into an amazing congregation representing God’s wonderful diversity. Since 2005, I have served as full-time pastor and spiritual shepherd to an open and affirming congregation whose arms are open to anyone who enters— men, women, children and youth, straight, gay, lesbian, bisexual, transgender, black, white, Latino, Asian, former Baptist, Pentecostal, Church of Christ, Methodist, Presbyterian, Lutheran, Catholic, Episcopal … the list goes on and on. The congregation grew from a small Bible study of ten to twelve people to a congregation of more than 700. As difficult as it was to leave this congregation, I know beyond a shadow of a doubt that my work at Holy Trinity is finished and that God is leading me to a new chapter in my life and ministry.’
From this open window we are privy to the ups and downs, the challenges and falls, the support and scoff, the real inside of what it is like to be a member of a minority struggling with prejudice. Cindy’s manner of writing is as inviting as a fine sermon by a congenial pastor and more. She is funny, truthful, honest, touching, and in the end – jubilant. Rarely has a writer been able to explore the trials Cindy has endured and still make us smile at the way in which she elects to inform us of the mountains she has had to climb – and the sun she has found at the top.
Yes, this book has a weighted spiritual side to it – we all need a bit of the true meaning of brotherly/sisterly love about now. Read this book and be elevated and thankful that there just may be other Cindys out there who need out support and we their teaching. Brava! Grady Harp, February 16
8 of 9 people found the following review helpful.
A powerful spiritual memoir with which I empathize totally
By Trudie Barreras
Once again, I need to credit my favorite author, Kittredge Cherry, for the tip-off to this book. “Two Pews from Crazy” by Rev. Cyd Andrews-Looper is a powerful spiritual memoir with which I can empathize totally. Although I placed my Kindle order for this book BEFORE reading the reviews already posted on Amazon (I always trust Cherry’s recommendations!) I was alerted to its importance by the fact that a number of VERY negative reviews were posted anonymously. From my own experience from 1978 – 2014 with the congregation and governance of a church ministering to the LGBTQ community, I am aware that although the practice of devouring and destroying pastors is a relatively universal phenomenon, those so-called “Gay Churches” or “Affirming Congregations” which have evolved in the past 40+ years are even more prone to dysfunction and drama.
Rev. Cyd’s story begins in the “usual” way for recent LGBTQ spiritual memoirs – she struggles with her conservative, fundamentalist upbringing, and eventually comes to the obvious conclusion that these rule-infested religious organizations do NOT, in fact, speak for God. Their rejection of homosexuality is only the tip of the iceberg of their lack of true discipleship when it comes to understanding and applying the Law of Love that Jesus came to teach.
I was pleased to note that a major influence in the author’s growth towards understanding that God’s love extends to everyone, and the prohibition of homosexuality really has no more basis than other narrow interpretations such as the prohibition of dancing, was her encounter with Dr. Rembert (Buddy) Truluck. As it happens, Dr. Truluck pastored the Metropolitan Community Church in Atlanta which I attended for over 30 years. Dr. Truluck’s tenure there was in the 1980’s, considerably before Rev. Cyd encountered him in Nashville. He is in fact the author of the book “Steps to Recovery from Bible Abuse”, published by Chi Rho Press in 1997, which I had the privilege of reading in draft form.
Rev. Andrews-Looper found that although the MCC congregation she encountered in Nashville offered affirmation of homosexuals as part of God’s beloved family, it was a theological mish-mash, and emotionally dysfunctional. I experienced this same reality during my time of attending MCC in Atlanta; for many years, it was the “only game in town” with the exception of the extra-ecclesiastical organizations such as Dignity (Catholic), Integrity (Episcopalian), and so on. By the time the author discovered this outreach, however, the Vatican had “lowered the boom” on Dignity, and the fundamentalist hard-liners had entrenched their homophobic stance in order to fight against Marriage Equality. Believers who had been rejected or abused by these groups sought acceptance in MCC churches, but they wanted a “culture” that reflected what they had grown to love in their former denominations, leading to inevitable conflict. On the other hand, the Episcopalians and several other mainline Protestant groups had begun to see the light, forming affirming congregations and even ordaining gay and lesbian clergy. Obviously, the United Church of Christ from which Rev. Andrews-Looper received her credentials is one of these. These affirming groups with their much more settled theology and governance structures clearly offered a better alternative to the dysfunction in her opinion.
One thing that becomes abundantly clear, however, as Andrews-Looper’s story unfolds is that those congregations which have broken away from the extremely restrictive patterns of more hierarchical organizational structures are still floundering in the cultural morass of spirituality versus sexuality. In addition, there are internecine power struggles that are directly related to the use of a “Board” or “Vestry” to govern local churches as well as an overarching denominational organization without real authority. Since I experienced an almost identical “ousting” of one of our MCC pastors by the combined machinations – I called it a “Star Chamber” – of the local board and the District, I could totally relate to what she went through.
Fortunately, the story does not end in the “slough of despond”. Rev. Cyd has discovered a new direction for her ministry, and is now firmly convinced that the commandment to “love your neighbor as yourself” does indeed mandate a healthy self-care and recognition that ministry requires a necessary balance. She has discovered the value of meditation, and because I’m blessed to have become devoted to centering prayer with its values of silence, solitude, simplicity and service, I believe she is indeed “on the Path”, and will continue to be a faithful follower of Jesus, with a fruitful and blessed ministry.
4 of 4 people found the following review helpful.
Live in your own truth with God
By Amanda L. Thornsberry
The journey of this book took me on the most intense rollercoaster ride of emotions mainly because I have been a member of the church since 2011. Before I move forward with the rest of my review of the book allow me for just a moment to give you the background of where I am today spiritually.
On December 28, 2010 I was driving from my hometown of Eastern Kentucky after a week of celebrating Christmas with my family. As usually I left feeling a mix of emotions because I had mostly felt like I didn't belong anywhere mainly for being different and constantly feeling judged primarily from conservative Christians. Most LGBTQ individuals have experienced this same judgement and emotions, mine is no different. On this particular day it was slightly different, nothing specific happened during my trip other than I was at the end of my rope of feeling confused and not knowing if I was even worthy of walking this earth.
I wanted so much to be normal and like everyone else without feeling judged by being nothing but exactly who I am. I knew I couldn't changebelieve me I triedbut you can't change what God created in the first place. So, I accepted that if I was going to go to Hell (according to the conservative Christians who worship a wrathful, judgmental God) then so be it. But that mindset left me in loneliness. Which brought me to this particular four and half hour drive home back to Nashville.
For the first time in my life, I had an open and honest conversation with God. I basically said "If this is who I am supposed to be then why did you make me like this?" God replied "You are my child and I love you". Me "Then why do I feel so alone, so judged and not worthy?" God replied "You are my child and I made you exactly the way I wanted you to be." Me "Then if I am worthy of walking this earth so me the way. I am at the end of my rope, God, and I can't take it much more." God replied "Just follow me and I will lead the way". There was more to the conversation and a lot of tears. God had the steering wheel because I do not know how I made it home safely with nothing but tears in my eyes.
I share this story because the next day I began searching for LBGTQ-friendly churches around Nashville. I found, you guessed it, HTCC. Being a reserved and cautious person, I contacted Pastor Cindy via email to see if she was willing to meet with me and we set up an appointment. The moment I walked into her office I felt welcomed but I also felt scared and uncertain of where God was leading me. That day was the first time that I had a pastor welcome me like any other person. My gender, my sexual orientation, and my identity was not on trial. Me as a human-being, a child of God was lost and searching for a way to be found. Needless to say, she invited me to attend a Sunday sermon. I accepted but it took me a couple of weeks to muster up the courage to walk inside the church but the day I did I was welcomed with open arms and I felt a breath of fresh air. I sat in the pew in the "old" sanctuary and listened to the first sermon that spoke of nothing but Gods love for all his children. Then I heard the scripture Jeremiah 29:11. This was the first scripture I had heard that wasn't twisted into telling me I was going to Hell. It was God's true message to me "For I know the plans I have for you," declares the Lord. "Plans to prosper you, not to harm you. Plans to give you hope and a future." That was what God has been trying to tell me all along. That day, God led me to HTCC and literally saved my life. I don't believe I would have hurt myself but I was very close to really not wanting to be on this earthy anymore but I will never know because God saved me before I could do anything.
The moral of sharing this story is that I write this review from a viewpoint of seeing HTCC as my lifesaver and the lifesaver of countless others. My experience with HTCC since 2011 has been nothing but positive and the sermons by Pastor Cindy, Pastor Patricia, and Pastor Bryan have all been unique but shared the same type message. God loves you no matter what.
After reading this book I was shocked by Pastor Cindy's experience as the senior pastor. I am also grateful that it was transparent to me and majority of the congregation because in the house of the Lord, it is about one thing worship and being one with God. I am also very shocked by the hateful, negative comments left by those that have seen this book as filled with lies. For someone like me, the only thing this entire situation causes is confusion because who can I believe "a Pastor who God led me to or comments from people behind a computer screen who point the finger at someone who is doing nothing but revealing her truth?"
I became a member of HTCC 6 months after becoming a regular attendee and I was baptized in the church. I was not around when all of events took place but when I came back one Sunday it was shared with the congregation (with UCC presence) that Pastor Cindy would be taking a sabbatical. Due to my work responsibilities I had missed several more Sundays including the one where it was announced that Pastor Cindy was leaving the church.
So, you can imagine for someone like me who found HTCC as her lifesaver to be nothing but confused and hurt by not only the revealing nature of this book but by the hateful, finger-pointing, negative comments from other members of the church. It has given me the confirmation that organized "religion" and churches are nothing short of just a business who talks about the love of God but doesn't have the actions (in the end) to show it. HTCC has become nothing but like all the churches around. A church is supposed to be a place for people like me to come and be one with God to spread his love and message of hope to all who do not know Him. Instead, we a church divided and members left stunned with the results of a revealing book.
The only thing I can say to all involved is stop the childish finger-pointing and the negative comments that is doing nothing but causing more hurt and confusion than there already has been. Most of all, stop the chatter and sit in the quiet so that you can hear the truth in others whether you agree with it or not. I am disappointed but with everyone in the way this is being handled from both sides of the fence.
Thank you Pastor Cindy for sharing your truth and to all who have shared their truths in the comments. It is time to move on and be one with God. After all, life is not possible without Him.
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